Bless this Jesus
Topic: Peru
Christmas Day was great fun full of cheesy gifts, good food (guinea pig for David, chicken for me), good company and too many pisco sours!

We walked up the hill to San Cristobal church in the morning. People from the local parish gathered outside. A brass band played and the poor queued up for tea, bread, panetone and donated toys for the children while their snooty-looking llamas waited for them in the nearby courtyard. Inside the dark church was a wonderful belen built on mountain terraces giving it an Andean feel.

The cathedral was the place to be on Christmas morning however. It was the first time that we had seen the front doors wide open. People were milling in and out even though the sermon was in full swing. Some people were in fancy dress. Many brought little little baskets containing a baby Jesus or two to be blessed by the priest. there were hundreds of them all over the steps in front of the pulpit. They were carefully dressed and resting on a silk bed. What's that all about? Well, our theory is that the catholics introduced this custom to the Incas in order to wean them off child sacrifices. This way, the Incas kept a sense of ritual and ceremony and no one got hurt.

Outside, after mass had finished, the people in fancy dress paraded and danced and sang their way through the streets of Cusco. At one point I was so excited about getting a perfect full on picture with no tourists in the way, that I tripped over the curb, landing on my camera and then sending it skidding along the pavement towards a bench where an old man sat in the sun. David tried to help me up but I just spluttered "my camera, my camera". I was hoping that the damage would be minimum but it is VERY badly damaged. I need to find somewhere to repair it. Ah well, at least I brought a back up camera with me but it isn't digital.

Christmas Eve In Cusco
Topic: Peru
We had planned a walk up the hill to the church on Christmas Eve but when we got outside, our plans changed immediately. We found that there was Christmas market in the main square! We started by looking at the food stands. The thing to eat on Christmas Eve apparently is an anticucho de corazon i.e. bits of grilled heart and a potato on a stick for 3 soles. David was tucking into his first by 10am.

We looked around the market for a while - it was absolutely packed. The stands sold mostly items to make a Belen (crib/nativity scene). Stables, shepherds, angels, that kind of thing. Whole stands were dedicated to one or two items i.e. just baby Jesuses all sizes with extra outfits and shoes, Sheep etc. Some stands advertised services "Babies and angels mended here". The poor people from the surrounding villages also had items for sale: things they found e.g. patches of grass, bits of lichen, moss and ferns. People bought them to make their Belenes look more authentic. The villagers sat in dusty heaps among their lichen and endless children eating ice lollies. It was a big occasion.

We escaped the chaos of the square to a new Mexican restaurant set in a quiet courtyard. We chatted to Walter, out waiter friend and ate fantastic soup. A smiling lady dressed in masses of petticoats and shawls interrupted us and tried to sell us items she had woven herself. We really didn't need anything but, of course, ended up buying a hard pumpkin hand engraved by her husband with Andean scenes. She was so delighted, she kissed us several times and wished us luck on our trip. She told us to be careful of pickpockets who come up from Lima.

We spent the afternoon, in and around the marketplace. That night we had a table booked at a trendy restaurant called the Fallen Angel and had a great time there. It was very festive with hats and turkey and so on.

We walked home through the square and the remains of the market. A lady was still trying to sell shepherds and a few Sponge Bob Square Pants figures. Most people had packed up leaving a ton of rubbish behind. David insisted on wearing his paper crown all the way home and enjoyed the comments this provoked. People snickered at him which is rich considering the hats that they themselves were wearing - a bowler, a trilby and even something that looked like an embroidered quiche!

the cock of the rock and the road back to Cusco
Topic: Peru
As this was our final day, we thought we would be able to have a nice lie in to say, 5.30. No such luck. If we had any hope of seeing Peru's national bird, the cock of the rock who lives in the cloud forest, we had to be on the move by 4.30 at the latest. Nicolas gave us a shout at 4am and by 4.23 we were in the truck eating bananas.

When it was just about light, we stopped at a place where you could peer through an opening at a place where the male cocks pick up females. We spotted something red in the trees - it was the guy himself! Funny looking fella. Big, bright scarlet with no sign of a beak. We watched 2 males for a while until breakfast was ready. After breakfast, we walked through the beautiful cloud forest for a while. I loved the cloud forest. the air seemed crisp and cool and thin compared to the thick, soupy, festering air in the rain forest. The path was lined with rich ferns and beautiful wild orchids. There were no mozzies, but a few strange butterflies.

The truck picked us up. Nicolas, full of cheer as ever, told us that because of the rain, there had been a landslide on the road ahead and we might not make it to Cusco. We found out later that a bus full of passengers had perished on that road but we had a smooth ride back.

As we came nearer to Cusco, we passed through small towns specialising in particular food - bread in one place, Cuy (guinea pig) in another and pork in another. We stopped at the pork one for a set lunch. The first restaurant was rejected (thank god) because the special of the day was stomach. David and Vaila seemed disappointed. We went to a place that had bits of fat and scraps on the menu instead.

We arrived in Cusco around 3pm and said goodbye to Nicolas, Cristian and the driver. They seemed pleased with our tips and we wished them a happy Christmas. We arranged to meet Vaila, Mark and Ann on Christmas day for lunch.

We checked into the Royal Inca hotel. Luxury beyond our wildest imagination (all relative). Crisp sheets, clean bathroom, separate sitting room downstairs, phone, balcony, carpet. Our first job was to get clean and get our laundry done. Then it was to eat. Then sort out an apartment in Buenos Aires for after Christmas.

Amazingly, we couldn't sleep. I had slept fine in tents in the rain, in lodges full of insects and on hard mattresses with damp sheets, but I couldn't sleep there. I think it must have been because of re acclimatizing to the high altitude again - we had gone up 2000m that day. The following nights were fine.

Last day on the river
Topic: Peru
Breakfast was unusually leisurely. Cristian, the cooker, proudly brought out a panetone, a kind of fruit bread that they have around Christmastime. It was horribly dry but we ate it so we didn't upset him. It was ok with drinking yogurt poured over it.

Nicolas, ever the optimist, told us that despite last night's thunder and rain storm, the river levels were low and we might have to pull the boat during part of the day's trip.

After breakfast, everyone came into our room to see the monster from the pits of hell which sat next to David's bed. Mark said it was like a land-langostine. It even beat the six cockroaches that they had in their tent the previous night. After the freak show, we motored off for the final river section, much slower than usual, up river. It was a cool, hazy day which we were all grateful for. We never even had to pull the boat.

Lunch was watery potatoes covered with bland yellow sauce eaten on the move. Cris was back to his previous standards. I looked back at one point during the afternoon as the cooker and the two boat guys had a water fight. This turned into a food fight. They were having great fun. I remember laughing at a pair of pants hanging from the ceiling drying, splattered with yellow peanut sauce.

We reached the end of our boat journey and after forming a human chain to empty the boat, we said goodbye to the lads and hello to our driver proudly polishing the new truck. We drove for a short while and then were dropped off to walk the remaining hour. The locals going past in the back of trucks (local transport) thought we were mad to be walking in such heat and they'd be right. I'm not sure we were even consulted. Nicolas did his usual. "Get out". "Walk". Then stomped on ahead of us. Finally we arrived at the town of Pilcopata and the lodge we had stayed at on the very first night. We remembered how primitive it had seemed at the time and how luxurious it seemed now - indoor bathrooms and electricity! We spent the next few hours chatting ad drinking cold beer. Very relaxing.

The jungle is wonderful, but....
Topic: Peru
The jungle really is wonderful, but there are a number of annoyances that I couldn't't wait to be rid of.

1. Mosquito bites. I had bites all over my ankles which wasn't helped by the wellies rubbing against them.

2. The outside showers where your newly washed flesh (free of deet) gets ravaged immediately. The wet floor means your stuff gets wet and the cold water makes you shriek.

3. Ditto outside toilets. You wouldn't believe where I got bites!

4. The fact that you are always covered in chemicals - sunblock and deet and then (a new thing and a godsend) after bite to stop the stinging!

5. The fact that your towel never dries properly.

6. Holding a torch and trying to find things in your backpack inside the tent especially when you are in a hurry and Nicolas is outside barking you us to "come on!"

7. Walking to the bathroom in the dark through the woods.

8. Having to use your clothes (clean or dirty) for a pillow

9. Always losing the torch/deet/socks/contact lense pot

10. Trying to take contact lenses in and out by torchlight while you are being bombarded by mozzies and the ledge is crawling with ants.

11. Being too hot and sticky to get inside the damp sleeping bag and not knowing who used them last!

12. Having to pack every morning in a hurry

13. The mud that gets everywhere

14. The deet that gets everywhere. It melts plastic, stinks and stings existing bites and flavours all your food.

Sounds like I had a horrible time doesn't it? I actually, I really enjoyed it but it was a very full on jungle experience and the only way you can appreciate it. Very few tourists visit this particular part and I'm glad as it means it is still very unspoiled.

Creepy Crawlies
Topic: Peru
We woke early to the eerie sounds of the howler monkeys. We showered in the dark which has its advantages: you can't see what monsters lurk in the corners (it's all open to the jungle).

Everyone was lively at breakfast. Mark and Ann found a Blair Witch like voodoo construction outside their tent - a stick with twigs tied around one end. What could this mean? It wasn't there the previous day.

We compared ankle bites. The cunning critters are biting through socks and trousers!

We spent the morning powering back by boat to Boca Manu, Fitzcarald (yes, like the film): to semi-civilisation and the airstrip where we would leave Nora and Alejandro. Alejandro is a mystery man from the jungle. He was introduced to us in Cusco simply as "an engineer coming to examine the campsites and lodges" but we generated alternative theories about his identity during the trip. What was funny was that we left Katherine to find her own way to the airstrip but we delivered Nora and Alejandro and even put them on the plane!

The airstrip was very amusing. We moored the boat and walked through the woods, past a house with washing out to a grass clearing with a basic shelter. Two men were mowing the grass with hand mowers. Mark and Ann told us that they had been doing the same thing when they had arrived. The shelter (4 poles and thatched roof) was in fact the terminal building, waiting room, check in desk and control tower. There was a weighing scales which weighed the baggage AND the passengers. A wheel barrow was available to take the bags to the plane. A military plane landed and people got off, including a charismatic gringo who knew Alejandro. We added further conspiracy theories to our growing plot. There is a novel in there somewhere. And a film. The trailer voice over would start: "A secret airstrip in the heart of the Amazon rain forest".

After putting Nora and Alejandro on the plane, the rest of us went back to Boca Manu for a lunch of rice and beans. A scabby, skinny dog patiently waited for leftovers, probably the best meal he had had in months. Well fed children pestered us with requests for coke and sweets. One boy said to me "Gringa, comprame gaseosa". I told him it would rot his teeth. He glared at me. I glared back. He knew I had won.

Before leaving, I went to the loo - it was a corner of the room behind blue plastic sheeting. To my surprise there was a real toilet (and a real bucket to flush it with brown river water).

After 3 more hours of boat travel (the reason why I have such a complete diary for this section!) we arrived at the lodge. We were very excited. It was beautiful - all wooden walkways nestled in tropical jungle. Clean towels and our own bathroom - luxury indeed! There were fewer mozzies but the candle light revealed the most enormous flying cockroaches up in the rafters. I hoped the flimsy mosquito net would keep them out.

After a brief rest, we put or wellies and went on a walk through the sludge to spot tapirs. I still don't actually know what a tapir is! Nicolas was in a foul mood. We think we was missing Nora. He stormed on ahead and shouted instructions back at us. It was really mucky, hot and sticky. The ground that wasn't flooded was covered with fungi, damp leaves and frogs. David kept walking into giant spider webs. We thought Shelob would get him. After about an hour, we reached a lookout tower and were told to sit still not moving or talking or looking out in an attempt to spot tapirs. No looking. No standing. No moving. No photographs. No talking. No breathing. Poor Vaila sneezed and received a dirty look from Nicolas. We sat there for about an hours and a half as it turned dark listening to the symphony of noises of birds and insects from the forest. We have serious doubts of the existence of tapirs. Nicolas had never even seen one! We walked back by torch light which was scary and exciting. I slipped in the sludge at one point and almost went in. I wonder how many creatures perished under 6 pairs of welly boots that night.

We could't wait to shower as we were hot, sticky and absolutely dripping. I loved taking a shower that I didn't share with 200 mosquitoes!

We had bought a bottle of warm Chilean wine in Boca Manu and we had it in out steel beakers to accompany the rubber chicken. Only Vaila would eat it (as a challenge) as she prides herself o being able to eat anything. She's not kidding. It would have been easier to eat rubber ball. We were laughing until we cried as we speculated as to the origin of the chicken. Even the "cooker" was laughing at it.

Monkey business
Topic: Peru
We were up early in order to get to the ox-bow lake and claim the floating platform by 8am. The sun beat down ye we spent a pleasant 3 hours drifting slowly around the lake spotting birds and animals - including the endangered giant otter, bats, turtles and a black caiman.

On the walk back we looked for woolly monkeys. When we found some, Nicolas decided to provoke them by shaking trees so that they would get angry and throw stuff down on us. I asked him to stop. He must have thought I was a right misery guts. I told him that we were there just to observe nature not interfere. A biologist should be giving us that speech not the other way around.

Deepest Darkest Peru
Topic: Peru
Ann, Mark and Vaila completed our party on Friday night, but on Saturday morning we had to say goodbye to Katherine. She was going to be taken to Boca Manu airport by another group and so we got in our boat to head down river towards the reserve zone. We had chosen this agency because they are among the few ones which have permits to visit the zone where there are no towns, just virgin rain forest. We had to stop to check in at the ranger's station and once inside the area, we really noticed a difference. We saw numerous white caiman (like a crocodile), turtles and different exotic birds much closer than before. There are sandy beaches on the river banks caused from natural erosion on the other side of the bank - sand deposits on the other bank. It's not unusual to see huge trees falling into the river. Men in Boca Manu collect them and make them into boats.

The weather was perfect - warm and dry, and after a few hours of pleasant travel on the river - moving air and no insects - we arrived at our campsite nestled deep in the forest.

We went on a walk to an ox-bow lake and up to a lookout post. We saw all sorts of horrors on the way. Nicolas thought it was really funny to pretend to throw critters at me. Not funny. Not even slightly. I told him so and he laughed and fake-threw a millipede at me. At least he didn't go near the Caterpillar pile. It's what caterpillars do for protection so that they look like a larger animal and deter birds from eating them. They make a pile of about 200 caterpillars and move together as one organism. Fascinating but disgusting.

Nicolas had just got a new camera and thought it a good opportunity to disturb wildlife with the flash. The poor little tree frog was stunned. I don't think the leaf-cutter ants were too pleased at having a camera in their path either. Nicolas had just told us that we shouldn't touch anything in their path as it disturbs them!

From the lookout tower we were able to see some lovely hoitsin birds up close. In the rafters of the tower was a sleeping boa constrictor. Of course, our fearless guide wanted to wake him up (to impress Nora no doubt who had taken a real shine to him). We talked him out of it.

We were in very full-on jungle. It was dense, green and smelled of rotting fruit and leaves. There was fungi everywhere, thousands of mosquitoes, beautiful butterflies in all shades and other unidentifiable flying critters. On the ground there were ant colonies, frog eggs surrounded by poisonous foam, unidentified gooey stuff, trees wrapped around tress wrapped around trees, vines and bright tropical flowers. There is of course the background sound of cicadas, howler monkeys, alien calls of exotic birds and idiotic whistles of infantile guide.

There was a strange ritual of tea at 6 followed by dinner at 7. We eat stale bread and sauco (funny berry) jam with cinnamon and clove tea. Then we have a delicious home made soup and 2 more courses. The "Cooker" (sic) really got his act together finally.

Macaw clay lick
The 5 o'clock starts were becoming the norm but fiddling around in a tent in the dark is no fun. We had no breakfast and had to be ready to leave by 5.30 in order to catch the parrots who visit the clay lick early each morning.

It was slinging it down with rain (it is a rain forest after all) and after taking the boat down river for a bit, we trudged through the mud and lashing rain for 20 minutes carrying our breakfast in tupperwares and flasks until we reached the lookout hut. Nicolas told us that we wouldn't see anything as it was raining so hard we settled down to breakfast and a lot of waiting around. It was warm and dry inside and I had brought a Thomas Hardy novel with me so I didn't mind too much. I was lost in Wessex and would occasionally look up and remember where I really was!

After 4 hours (really, I am not making this up), the rain eased and stopped and a flock of about 40 colourful macaws descended to feed on nutrients from the clay wall. It was really amazing to see them. They made loads of noise as if they were fighting, and stayed for almost an hour. We watched with fascination and couldn't leave until they did as we would frighten them.

After the parrot show, it was back to the boat and an hour trip to the lodge we were staying at. It was again, very basic but really beautifully situated. The weather really brightened up and we spent the afternoon on the wooden balcony drinking warm beer, reading and watching the wildlife all around us.

The last three people in our party, Vaila, Ann and Mark, arrived later that day. They had (perhaps sensibly) decided to fly in. Their arrival marked a sudden change in the food. The quality improved enormously and we even started to get puddings! We wondered which of them was from head office or writing for a travel magazine.

Rain forest, day 2
Topic: Peru
I felt a lot better and was able to start eating solids again. The transport on day 2 was by boat as there were no more roads. The boat was long with comfortable seats and a roof. When it rained, we covered ourselves with plastic sheets. We motored down the chocolate coloured river for most of the day with a few stops for walks to spot birds, monkeys and plants. It was mozzie hell. After just 10 minutes of the second hike, I could hear David going SLAP-OUCH all the time. I looked round to find him with a fat lip and a face that looked like bubble-wrap. Yes, he had been bitten to pieces. We borrowed some of Katherine's killer deet which seemed to do the trick.

Nicolas thinks he can talk to the animals. He whistled at them all the time in various tunes, it was really annoying plus they take no notice!

We got to the campsite just before dark and found that the lads had put our tents up for us on raised wooden platforms. The campsite is very rustic, i.e. rainwater shower and no electricity but it's very charming.

After dinner, we went out for a walk to look for tarantulas and found one! Yuck. Those things are huge and scary. It wasn't too far away from the campsite either! We just hoped that they were no good at zips.